32. In circles again and over again
A woman complains about not getting her period. It’s been two months since he’s had one.
Me: Do you believe there’s a chance you’re expecting a child?
No, patient! It’s not possible.
Me: Do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend?
Yes, of course, patient.
Me: Do you utilize any security?
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No, patient.
Me: Do you think you’re expecting a child?
Rep for another 15 minutes.
I swear if we had stapled a bag of pregnancy tests to the door with a sign saying “Think you’re pregnant?” we could have cut down on the number of visits to the ER. “Please take one!” And affixing an ultrasound probe to the door with a sign that reads, “Want a picture of the baby?” This is where we take the ultrasounds.”